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Gottman Method Couples Therapy

The Gottman Method Couples Therapy is a well-known and evidence-based approach to couples therapy developed by Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman. It is grounded in decades of research conducted by the Gottmans, who are renowned psychologists and relationship experts, and it is used here in NYC, New York, and River Edge, NJ. The method is designed to help couples improve their emotional connection, sex life, communication, and overall relationship.

The Gottman Method is based on the Sound Relationship House Theory, which outlines the key components of healthy relationships. Some of the core principles and techniques of the Gottman Method Couples Therapy include:

  • The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: This concept refers to four communication behaviors that can be detrimental to a relationship: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Couples are encouraged to recognize and work on reducing these negative patterns of interaction during couples counseling.

  • Building Emotional Intelligence: The method emphasizes the importance of emotional awareness, empathy, and understanding in a relationship. Couples learn to express their emotions effectively and respond empathetically to their partner's emotions.

  • Love Maps: A love map is the knowledge and understanding of one's partner's world, including their interests, dreams, and concerns. The method encourages couples to continually update and deepen their knowledge of each other.

  • Fondness and Admiration: This principle emphasizes the importance of expressing fondness, admiration, and appreciation for one's partner. Couples are encouraged to focus on the positive aspects of their relationship.

  • Turn Towards Bids for Connection: Couples are taught to recognize and respond positively to each other's bids for attention, affection, or emotional connection. This helps to reduce intimacy issues and foster emotional closeness.

  • Managing Conflict: The Gottman Method teaches couples constructive ways to manage conflicts and disagreements. Techniques include active listening, compromise, and finding common ground.

  • Making Repairs: Repair attempts are actions or words used to de-escalate conflicts and relationship issues and restore emotional connection. In couples counseling, partners learn to recognize and use repair attempts effectively.

  • Accepting Influence: This principle encourages partners to be open to each other's perspectives and ideas, valuing and considering each other's opinions and needs.

  • Creating Shared Meaning: Couples are guided to establish shared goals, values, and rituals, which contribute to a sense of shared meaning in their relationship.

The Gottman Method Couples Therapy aims to empower couples with practical tools and strategies to strengthen their relationship and navigate challenges effectively. Through a combination of assessment, education, and therapeutic interventions during couples therapy sessions, couples work to enhance their emotional bond, communication skills, and overall relationship.

The method has been extensively researched and has shown to be effective in improving relationship satisfaction and reducing the risk of divorce. Couples who participate in Gottman Method Couples Therapy often report improved communication, increased intimacy, and a greater understanding of each other's needs and desires

Contact Blue Anchor Psychology Today

Blue Anchor Psychology has locations in New Jersey and New York. Our team has helped many couples with their relationship issues through our therapeutic process. If you plan to seek couples therapy in NYC or NJ, contact Blue Anchor. 

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